I grew up in a culdesac of sorts, where there were three primary families. Three moms. Three dads. Six kids. I had my mom and two kind-of "bonus moms". It was the best. These were women, that I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, were safe and available to turn to. One who I called when my mom was out of town, and I got my first period. One who taught me how to line dance, a skill that proved useful over the years as a Calgary gal. Women who were cheering me on from the sidelines. Women who showed up years later when I had my own babies, full of excitement that I had entered a new stage of life, eager to know how the transition was going. It meant something. Perhaps, I didn't realize it at the time, but years later as a mother myself, I would come to realize that it was everything.
I had thought about it now and then. Especially when one of those bonus moms, lost her battle to cancer, when my own boys were babies. I started to realize how much those relationships had meant to me as a young girl. I started to even consider what they might have meant to my mom. I started to crave that type of village to raise my own kids in. But let's face it, building a community of fierce and loving women, it's not easy in this day and age.
Don't get me wrong, I have some amazing friends that I have gained over the years. We can chat, catch up, text back and forth over the latest conundrum, even book a weekend to hang out with one another. I have some of the very best friends. But most of them live in other places and in spite of having some amazing women in my life, I didn't quite have that village I had growing up.
Then, one day, out the blue, on a random Tuesday night after sushi and drinks with your new best mates, you realize, you have it. You have the thing you grew up with. You have a thing you've always wanted. You have the thing you want for your kids. You've built your village. In a quiet and cozy mountain town, your kids will get to share in the warmth that you grew up with too.
It's the safety of knowing you can show up your raw and honest self. It's the comfort of knowing they will throw you a life preserver when you're in the deep end. It's the beauty of knowing when your heart is hurting, theirs are too. It's the relief in knowing that another mom can do pick up for you when you're in a pinch. It's the baking mom that will make a play date to decorate sugar cookies so your kids get that experience too. It's all the big and little daily things where you know, you are not alone. It's the assurance that your kids have other strong women in their lives that they can turn to at the park or after school or truly, whenever they need them. It is everything.
I am humbled and grateful that in this big busy world, after a move to a brand new town, that I have a beautiful little village that are here for me and here for my boys.
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